Chantal

I could feel them. They were rising up quickly ready to spill down my cheeks. Tears. Vulnerably showing my deep seeded emotions. My lips were quivering. I was trying to hold my breath for fear of being embarrassed, yet somehow shallow gasps escaped. I finally allowed my body to be free to express myself. I knew I was safe, I was free in that space with Chantal Kreviazuk. I was reacting honestly to the song, "In this Life," she was belting out in this awe-inspiring, empowering way. Chantal is raw, honest and one of the most wisest woman I have ever met. She is a gifted songwriter who gets to the core of our humanness.

Chantal was the guest artist for the Imagine Film Festival at Ontario Shores Centre for Mental Health Sciences. She is an advocate for CMHA raising awareness for mental illness, trying to stamp out the stigma that surrounds mental health and sharing that knowledge through the arts. She says, "I want people to realize that we're all born with unique challenges. When we isolate people because of their differences, the fabric of our society is compromised." You can read more here. Chantal has a close family member who wrestles with mental illness so her perspective is a unique one and one I can relate to, which is the reason I reacted so strongly to this song.

I experienced a God-moment with Chantal that night. I will forever cherish the moment. For me, it was "church"-well how church should be. "Broken people NOT pretending to be broken." (Remember this post?) There was an aura of raw honesty, respectability, love and freedom. Connection. She gets my perspective and I can't tell you the relief I experienced in my soul. Also, she gave me hope, in the form of art, to express my outlook of mental illness because as she said, "it is complicated."

My friends and I had the privilege of meeting Chantal after the concert. She is SO down-to-earth and real. A people person for sure who LOVES connecting with her audience. She took time with everyone to chat, sign autographs and take pictures. She appeared to be in NO hurry. A beautiful evening that has since spurred many ideas in my head on how I can advocate. She is my kind of girl that Chantal!

Chantal Kreviazuk and I at the Imagine Film Festival, Whitby, ON, Oct. 20, 2010

home

best friends together again offering free love

HOME: "a place of refuge, 'in the bosom,' warm closeness, a state of enclosing intimacy."

Have you ever been enjoying a moment where everything is fitting together perfectly and you suspect you are part of something bigger than yourself (I call those "God-moments!"), part of an unfolding story where you know beyond a shadow of a doubt you will be a piece of the conclusion, a moment where words are incapable of explaining that which is taking place in your soul and externally around you?

I had the privilege of experiencing a "God-moment" a few weekends ago at my dear friends' home. My other dear friend Shave and I dropped in unexpectedly to the Dallas home on that sunny Saturday afternoon. Shave was in town and wanted a visit with us together.

The Dallas home is beyond welcoming! There is always the smell of fresh baking permeating the air. The kids always greet me with a hug and a kiss and a "I love you Aunt Skin!"("Aunt Skin" is my nickname given by their mom a long time ago! I can't believe it has stuck and been passed down to the next generation!) There is always laughter. The Dallas home is always busy yet intimate. The patriarch and matriarch of the home, Darryl and Lisa, have a gift of hospitality. Immediately, they make you feel comfortable and at home. Free love is all around. The Dallas home is a place where one can totally be themselves. It is home. It is a "place of refuge, in the bosom, warm closeness, a state of enclosing intimacy."

What Shave and I didn't know was the Dallas' were expecting company later that afternoon. But they didn't care we were there. In fact, they wanted us to stay. So, we stayed! It was definitely meant to be. We helped with the food preparation and the setting of the table. My soul was filled and happy even in doing these mundane chores!

Instantly, when the guests arrived, Shave and I felt a connection with these strangers. The kitchen of the Dallas home is the heart of their home so as we, strangers and friends, stood together in this space, something special began to form. It is difficult for me to put into words, yet I somehow want to capture this moment so I won't forget.

...healing...forgiveness...no filter...laughter...tears...peace....singing...harmonies...dancing to Wii...amazing food...listening...honesty...coming alongside and helping one of the strangers on their journey of faith...silly talk...comfort...comfortable...sounds of children everywhere...love...love...and more love...free love...Jesus...free love...

I am incredibly grateful to be part of this stranger's story. I am incredibly grateful for the gift of friendship. My soul is once again energized. I am at home.

home: "a place of refuge, 'in the bosom,' warm closeness, a state of enclosing intimacy."

Happy New Year Ramblings

Genuine, pure, warm hospitality- a rare gift so aptly modelled by my parents...

(Dec.25, 2009, Whitby, ON)

...inviting newcomers to Canada ( who happen to be friends of mine but strangers to my folks) over to enjoy Christmas dinner with our family. We spared no expense with immersing them into our favourite Canadian ( via our British ancestors) traditions of Christmas Crackers ( see photo above), Plum Pudding with my delicious secret sauce, salt fish (well this is a Newfie tradition), Christmas cake and crokinole (I don't know if they play this game in the UK or not)! A wonderful time was had by all!

Refuge

shelter or protection from danger or trouble, to take refuge from a storm.
a place of shelter, protection, or safety.
anything to which one has recourse for aid, relief, or escape.
retreat, sanctuary, haven.

(Shave and I on Dec. 28, 2009, Kingston, ON.
Yes, I am drinking my first beer ever, well it is actually Strongbow Cider! I LOVED it!)

How can I ever express my inmost gratitude for the time spent with my precious friend over the holidays? She created a refuge for my soul. A shelter, a sanctuary, a haven, an auspicious occasion, a refuge.

refuge
safe
understood
loved unconditionally
healing deep wounds
release without judgement
grace
tears
laughter
prayer
compassion
forgiveness
kindred spirits
defenders of friendship
silence
family
strength
fearless
blessed
refuge like our Father

How can I ever express my inmost gratitude to my Father for allowing our paths to cross when we were but innocent teenagers? It is a one-of-a-kind, once-in-a-lifetime friendship that has endured the test of time? I am blessed. Thank you my sweet Shave! Thank you my sweet Father! Both of you are a refuge like no other!

"Therefore if anyone is in Christ, they are a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!" (2Cor. 5:17)

(Dressed and ready to ring in the new year with my friends at The H.'s house on Dec. 31, 2009, Oshawa, ON)

I started a new tradition, well new to me, for New Year's Eve. I was visiting my sweet Brasilian friend over the holidays and she told me in Brasil everyone wears white on New Year's Eve. It symbolizes starting anew. Wiping the slate clean so to speak. Jesus wiped our slate clean- "washed our sins white as snow."

"We tend to rehash the past and rehearse the future. You can fret as much as you want, and it's not going to change anything. Why not get through with grace and ease?"
Julianna Margulies, actress

Also, white is made of seven colors, so the wearing of white can also symbolize bringing "colour," vibrancy, life into the new year. At midnight, you are to make a wish. If your wish involves finding love then you wear a touch of red :)

My prayer for 2010 (from Hal Helms, Echoes of Eternity, Volume 2):

"What do you think God expects from you? Just this: Live in His presence in holy reverence, follow the road He sets out for you, love Him, serve God, your God, with everything you have in you, obey the commandments and regulations of God that I'm commanding you today-live a good life."
(Deut. 10:12-13, The Message)

"Continue on in the path, My son and My daughter. It is a good path, and leads onward toward our mutual goal. Calm your fears, child. I am here and will be here always and all the way. Deo Gratias "

Stranger in the Night

**Update** I will use the following story for this week's theme of "night"over at Thematic Photographic, even though I do not have an actual photograph. I hope you can visualize the photo! I will try to look in my archives of hard copies for a prairie wintry night!

Startled, I awoke at 3 am to the sound of loud banging at my door. Reluctantly I stirred from my cozy, warm bed and answered the door. It was our security man, Keith. The year was 1991 and I was a student in my final year at Briercrest Bible College in Caronport, Saskatchewan. ( for my American friends, Saskatchewan is one of the prairie provinces north of the Dakota's!)

Caronport, home of Briercrest, is situated on the Trans Canada Highway in the middle of nowhere - well for a city girl from Ontario, it was the middle of nowhere! It used to be the old Canadian Air Force base in the early 1900's. A Petro Canada gas station and restaurant was located at the entrance to Caronport. However, they were not open at three in the morning.

The weather outside was bone chilling cold, typical for the prairies in the middle of winter. The wind was howling at break-neck speed stirring the dusting of snow viciously across the highway.

Keith apologized for waking me up but needed my help. A young girl driving alone from Calgary, Alberta to Brandon, Manitoba ( about a 15 hour drive) hit black ice and rolled her car into the ditch right in front of the gas station.

Clearly, God was watching over this girl. Caronport was the only town for miles and at three in the morning, on an extremely cold winter's night, there wasn't much traffic on the highway. She would have froze to death, alone in her car.

Instead, God brought her to us. Keith told me he took her to the guest room on the first floor of my dorm. He asked that I go be with her as she was pretty shaken up. Miraculously, she suffered no physical injuries.

By this time I was wide awake and had the kettle on. I brought her a cup of hot chocolate to warm her insides and warm her shaken soul. I sat with her for a while. We didn't talk much but I did ask if she would like me to pray for her. She accepted my offer and quietly sobbed as I petitioned God. After our prayer, I left her alone so she could get some rest before her father arrived from Manitoba the next day. As I climbed back into my cozy, warm bed to try to get a couple hours of sleep before breakfast, I thanked God for protecting this girl and allowing Keith and I to assist her in this tangible way.

By the time I awoke later that morning she was gone. I never did find out the ending to her story. Yet over the course of the next couple of years she would come to my mind and I would say a little prayer for her.

It has been about 15 years since I have thought about that stranger in the night. I can't recall her name now. Nevertheless, God brought her to my mind this morning while I was sitting in church. I don't know why but do know I needed to say a little prayer for the girl who almost froze to death, alone on that cold, dark wintry night on the prairie.