Resolved

Jesus says, “A thief comes only to steal, kill and destroy. I come so you can have real and eternal life, more and better life than you ever dreamed of.” (John 10:10, The Message)

I had to make the call, but not to the source of my temptation. Rather to the source of unconditional friendship. My mind wrestled with this decision. In one corner, Truth, in the other, Tempter. Tantalizing, tormenting, teasing. Luring me. Strength eluded me. But, GRACE found me. She held on tight, intertwining her mercy around the core of my soul.

Never before have I had a married man pursue me. And never before have I been tempted to pursue a married man.

I was in a vulnerable state when this man and I crossed paths. I had encountered, once again, piercing words of discouragement from people whom I believe meant well.
“What is wrong with you, why aren’t you married? You are too picky. Just be content then you will meet someone, etc.” Utterances that imply there is a formula for finding love and companionship. Utterances that imply rejection and failure.

The great tempter, Satan, loves to use these oral missives to his advantage. I began to believe these lies. “I must be a horrible person for no guy to want me. There must be something horribly wrong with me. I must be ugly. I must be overly picky. I am such a failure, etc.” Highly exposed, I latched onto every flirtatious, acclamatory remark from the mouth of this married man. The chemistry was certain. It felt amazing. I won’t deny. The battle in my mind continued to rage. Do I cross the line?

One afternoon while driving home from work, my weak cries of help to God were heard. Suddenly I had this overwhelming burden to call my best friend and recount my predicament. (I hadn't spoken to anyone about this yet) My precious, ever so wise, kindred spirit brought clarity and not judgment to my plight. It was a “God-thing.” That very morning, my beautiful “sista” was reading in Matthew 4 where Jesus was being tempted by Satan. At one point Jesus said, “Beat it Satan!” I love how The Message translates this verse. Over the phone, I bellowed, “Beat it Satan” too. I knew once I vocalized the situation the battle would be over. I knew the Truth. I knew it was wrong. I knew I could not cross that line. Yet somehow I was blindsided.

However, the GREAT news is ONLY because of God’s grace, mercy, strength, wisdom and protection, did I make the right choice. I am amazed. I am thankful. I am free. I am celebrating what God has done for me!

My pastor spoke on this John 10:10 passage yesterday, so I was reminded of this God story. I felt impressed to share it here on my blog. I’m not sure why, but my hope is that it can encourage the person that needs to hear it today.

“God is my shield. Lord please accept my willing offerings of praise and teach me your judgments. My life is constantly in danger yet I do not forget your instruction. The wicked have set a trap for me, but I have not wandered from your precepts. I have your degrees as a heritage forever; indeed, they are the joy of my heart. I am resolved to obey your statutes to the very end.” (Psalm 119:108-112, The Message)